How to make love

Caught your attention by the title le.

Achieve what you want

I believe that a student in university have time for 3 major things:
i)Education
ii)Leisure
iii)Misc

As mention in i), i strongly believe that as a student our priority is to study and concentrate on our education. This should be our main priority.
Often at times, students use their time more on to leisure such as play games, socialise and etc.

Above all that we still have an ounce of time,which is our misc time. What exactly you use that on? Be it Club work, outings, events/activities, hang out,drink tea as i've mentioned above.
But mine is business, with all the time in the world, why don't we be more entreprising?
Fork out that time to do something for our future.

I like to point out that everthing we do, we have a goal or a dream. Never forget that my goal of doing business is for my loved ones such as my family and my girlfriend. Let them be your driving force to what you want to achieve. Love them and support them.
Apart from inspiring people to achieve what they really want in life, in this business i also want to paved my way to a platfom to realise bigger potential.

Over the years, i've been telling people to change,by changing their attitude. I do this because i want to help my friends. Most of my friends, just like myself came from an rough background.
I've discover something more important than an attitude change which is perception change.
I'll blog about that some other time, or you can talk to me about it.



Along the way you'll meet great people that inspire you, let us pass on the torch of inspiration. Whereby everyone can WIN!
We used to believe that in order for someone to win, someone has to lose. But in most case we can create a WIN-WIN situation. We don't have to be victimize or letting others get the best of us in order to get what we want.

How to create a WIN-WIN situation:
a)Communicate effectively.
b)Change your mindset, being sacrifices is not honorable.

I'm willing to share and help you grow your business. As a way to giveback for the people that thought me valuable lessons that i meet along the way.
-----
See also:

Businessmen and People that inspired me.

Engineering vs. Management

Interesting analogy :-

A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He
reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He
descended a bit more and shouted,

"Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I
would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I
am."

The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon
hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're
between 40 and 41 degrees North latitude and between
59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be an engineer," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told
me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to
make of your information, and the fact is, I'm still
lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If
anything, you've delayed my trip."

The woman below responded, "You must be in
management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you
know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are
or where you are going. You have risen to where you
are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a
promise which you've no idea how to keep, and you
expect people beneath you to solve your problems. And
when things don't go right, you would always blame
those below !"

Baby

Baby, It's hard to describe, in just a few paragraphs, the love and a friendship that grew beyond expectation and remarkably beyond our wildest imagination.

We became almost inseparable. Rarely a day went by, and never a week, without spending intensive amounts of time together. I will always cherish you my laopo and be ever loving to you. You are the best and im ever proud of you. Baby, you light up my day by just a simple smile. Laopo, you have truly touched my heart and soul.


Baby, you are my lover, my best friend, my partner and companion for life .Im in love with you always.
Together we build our dreams and memories together ya ^^!

Monitoring System

Launch!

Yay! SAPS points

At the end of this trimester,my SAPS points is half of what i got last trimester.
Somehow or rather i just love to see statistics!

Think out of the box!

"Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds..."

In recent days I feel this quote being chanted out loud everytime i come across someone that didn't think big.

I too recall of making a comment on the day when i return from my holidays and resume my trimester here in MMU. It was a comment on people. Till today that comment still hold true.

What is your deepest fear?

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

To fail

The notion that you are inevitably going to fail, is much more painful than the notion that you have failed, because it has yet to happen.

1,2,3s...

The first is think. Think about the values you wish to live your life by.


The second is believe. Believe in yourself based on the thinking you've done about the values you're going to live your life by.


The third is dream. Dream about the things that can be, based on your belief in yourself and the values you're going to live by.


The last is dare. Dare to make your dreams become reality, based on your belief in yourself and your values

Chicken or Eagle

One day a hunter went hunting and saw an eagle. He took his rifle and shot the eagle at it's nest.

He later went to it's nest located at the ridge of a cliff and acquire it's eggs.
So he took an egg back with him.

The egg hatched and he place the eagle hatchling with chicks and raise them.
Soon after the 'eagle' began pecking like a chicken. And did all things of a chicken and couldn't fly.

From being a predator to being a prey. The hunter wanted an eagle not a "chicken".
So the grief hunter decided to "change" his "chicken" back into an eagle. So he took his eagle back to the wild.

He then threw the eagle off a cliff with a deep valley. The eagle was plunged to its death.
The frightened eagle grew anxious and eventually flapped and flapped its wings. Moments before it fell to the bottom, it flew and rose to the sky.

This story tells us that who we mix with and what we perceive is vital to success.

Dold

This is Dold. The doll owned by Trystan. Inspired from the popular anime series-Bleach.

In the anime Bleach, where the Bounts are introduced as a race that consumes human souls.
Although the individual Bounts originated at various locations throughout the world, they have a distinct German theme. For instance, the German language is used in their incantations and the names of their dolls are distinctly German.

Mine is distinctively Swedish because I bought my Dold from IKEA. The name Dold originates from one of the names of furnitures available at IKEA.

Dold's statistics:

Dold is Trystan's doll, embodied as a wooden figurine of a man. Dold's ability is to manipulate it's physique to resemble and to emote expressions in most of it's forms. Because of his rough, solid frame, Dold is impervious to basic sword attacks and most other physical damage. Dold also grants Trystan the power to feel motivated and artistically inspired.

Outing: Bukit Jalil Park

During one of my trips up to KL, i went to visit a close friend of mine, Camille.

We met up at Bukit Jalil Stadium and head off to Sri Petaling for lunch. After a gruesome drive around the place ,trying hard to maneuver in heavy traffic, we finally got back on track and went to Bukit Jalil Park for a long chat.

Then we came to this lake. I was amazed that there's so much fauna in it. Camille claims that when she was younger,she used to come here and there's a lot more than what i saw that day.

Man, there are so many turtles in the lake. And damn, there's a lot of fish. The lake was so full with stuff that when i reach down into the lake and grab something. A turtle came up.

OK that was a little exaggeration in it. I put my hand in the lake and it drew attention. And so came the turtle. Curious turtle we called it. Or was it silly turtle?
Nevermind. So i grab it by the shell(8 inches wide) while it was still swimming.

Ever tried that without plunging into the water, amazing feat i tell you.

Turtle: What da' fuck you want huh?

Yeah CK and Nelson if you're seeing this. Yeah it's a turtle.

Maybe i should rename this post as Turtle Adventure or something.

Outing: Around Melaka

Satay Celup


Me and Aaron


Mollyna, CK and me




The gang


Me and my best friend CK

Travels:Take note

Option 1:
KLIA-->Nilai KTM-->Seremban KTM--> Melaka Sentral
RM0-->RM2.50-->RM2.30-->RM5.30

Total Cost: RM2.50+RM2.30+Rm5.30=RM10.10

Option 2:
KLIA--> KL Sentral--> LRTs-->Pudu-->Melaka Sentral
RM0-->RM9.00-->RM3.00-->RM10.90

Total Cost: RM9.00+RM3.00+RM10.90=RM22.90

Extra extra! read all about it

When i first got a forward message on my Yahoo! Messenger about a guy that committed suicide/ jumped off/slipped off( as prefered by newspapers to uphold the reputation of my University), i didn't give a damn.
"So what, none of my business" i thought.

Becaming road pizza after committed suicide/ jumped off /slipped off from the 18th floor of Ixora Apartments just became the hottest topic around campus.

Conversation would go from something like this:
Mel: Wah, budak alpha jump from Ixora leh!
Stan: If it's suicide. He should just donate all his organs first. Maybe even his money.
Mel: If he didn't had money?
Stan: Well it's still dumb by jumping off. The people's money is wasted by using public services.

To this:
Stan: I saw my YM yesterday, tons of people forwarding messages to me about a guy that committed suicide or various other versions. His friendster also forward. Damn mou liu.
Yong Meng: Ya i heard! Gamma or Delta student leh, very active in CLS one.

Even lecturers are interested:
(while in lift)
Mr. Senthil: Prepared for midterms already?
Stan: Of course. It's just 2 days away.
Mr. Senthil: So the boy that jumped from Ixora, he is a FET or FBL student?
Stan: He's a Gamma student for sure.
Mr. Senthil: Oh, I'm still wondering whether he's a FET or FBL student.
(lift opens, i shrugged and left)

TIP:
If you want to kao or chase a person that you don't know in my University, walk up to her and go about with this conversation:
Guy: You stay in Ixora is it?
Girl: Ya ya.
Guy: Yesterday what happened there ar?
Girl: Oh, (various versions of a human falling down from the 18th floor)...
Guy: So where were you when it happened?
Girl: Some place.
Guy: ....(continues)
Girl: ....(continues)
(Proceeds to take down her number)

There you have it-you've just made the initial step.
Preferably if she lives in Ixora Apartments. Tested effective.
*Outcome may vary from person to person. Age factor: 12+. Guy and Girl each sold separately.
For further information, look at the back of the box for instruction of use.

---
Read also
How would you want to be remembered?

G.U.T.S.

How exactly to be more successful:

If you tell everyone around you: "I hope to be successful." Then you will surely fail. As your hopes gets bigger, so goes your failure. Because you only hope. Hoping is just a mere qualification of success.
Hope to be --- 60%

The next approach to be more successful is that, you mentally tell yourself:
"I need to be successful." It's ok. But that's not enough. Because sometimes you need to be, sometimes you don't need it.
Need to be --- 70%

Let's look at the next- " I want to be successful." Good progress but there's still a tendency of failure. Again, sometimes you want, sometimes you don't. Some people want more money, some want more property. But at the end of the day after striving hard at it, some just give up and say, "Don't want also nevermind lah."
Want to be --- 80%

" I must be successful !!!". We are getting there. There are people that hope to be, need, want to be and must be successful in what there are doing. But still we didn't make 'being successful' as our top priority. So we grade it:
Must be --- 90%

So we all might be wondering, what's 100%?
...
..
.
Die also want! If we look at many unsuccessful people, they don't have something. They don't the " Die also want!" spirit in them. Take a look at some couples, the guy chase the girl, the girl chase the guy. The parents protest and object to the relationship.
" I don't care. I love her!!!" Some even scream until they can embed their finger nails into the walls and climb walls." I love her no matter what others' say! Die also want!"
Then you'll be successful. If you don't have this spirit, most of your things you do , you can't get it right.

Seen a baby before? If a baby could talk, he/she will say:
" Mommy i hope to drink milk...mommy...mommy..."
Sorry man, mom wouldn't be bothered and fall straight back to sleep.
What usually happens is that the baby will scream and whine:
" WAAAAAAAAA WAAAAA....NYAHHHHH..NYAAAHHHh..
(whatever sounds kids make when they whine).
And when the bottle comes. The baby attach himself/herself immediately to the nipple.
That my friends is a 100%.

今天你还没有成功因为你没有死都要只是开顽笑

To be continued... Keep updated for Part II
Genuine Urge To Success(G.U.T.S)
A subsidiary of Trystan Motivation Corp.
(a department in my brain to remind myself to be motivated)

人要比车凶

I always say this to some of the people that know me : 人要比车凶
"Ren yao bi che xiong." ( A man must be more fierce/agressive than his car)

If you've ever watched Initial-D the anime series. You'll only hear it in one conversation between the drivers. But when i heard it, it strucked me. It was years back, but today i still remind myself and my friends that seek advice about this.

In life it's the same. You must be in control or else the situation will be.
It's the same with driving(in the case of Initial-D, it's racing), you must be in control of the car, or the car will be in control of you.

Now take charge and don't let the situation or challenges 'dapao' you!

TriStan the Rant.ist

Recently I've met a friend that gives me puzzle of names, usually jumbled up words that forms into names. Most of which are reall easy. Don't need no bombastic Da Vinci code or anagrams or complex algorithm knowledge to solve.

One of the puzzle that the friend gave that struck me was a simple one: Rantist

Thoughts came to mind:
1. The ranter. A very very witty blog that i read.
2. Similiar to the ranter, but as a different noun-rantist.
3. Sounds like rapist or dentist. Urgh. Nevermind.

When arranged properly it becomes: tristan
No wonder.

So I shall continue to rant and rant.

My brother's name is Dennis = Sinned, oh wow.... i finally get it.

So what's yours?

Your neighbourhood hero

I recall when i was in my Beta year, which is my second year in my university. i rescued a girl in a playground in my neighbourhood. It was well past 10.40pm and the area around the park was pin-drop silent.
When i found her she was squatting by the see-saw, sobbing away silently. I arrived short of 3 minutes. The gang had already left her.

She was mugged by 7 or 8 men. She lost RM2000 in that incident and she didn't knew what exactly happened. But she knew who to call.
Still clutching to her phone , i walked her to my house and called a friend and subsequently called the cops. We went to lodge a police report soon after.

Days before the mugging, my housemate's room got entered by a conmen. The conmen asked him to go upstairs to turn off the main water switch. Now, like any sane person, we all know that the main water switch is outside and not on the 1st floor of our house. By the time he realised this, the man sped off on his motor with his wallet and phone. Leaving behind burst pipes and broken toilet with water flowing everywhere for me to fix up later. In the first place he let the man into the house thinking that he was the plumber that the landlord called.

We lodged a police report for the house break in the same day as the mugging, since my housemate thought it was convenient then.

...

Today, not donned in my super hero outfit or rather in my normal civilian clothes, the non-opinionated 'Rakyat', i went to get fuel for my friend's car that stopped cos' it went out of gas. It was pouring hard that night and i had to walk 20 minutes in the rain to get to the nearest gas station. The car stopped after fetching a few friends back to the apartment since it was raining and they were trapped in the pouring rain under a shelter.

I can't spin webs or fly through the sky but anyone can help someone else by having a good heart.

You ask this you'll be the president

If you ask 2 questions during Parent/Teacher Association meeting, you'll be the chairman of the association at the end of the month. You just have to speak up these questions during the meeting since no one bothers to speak up during the meetings and it gives you ample time to balance yur chequebooks.

First Question: " How do we raise more funds and money for the school? I see that the school need more money for courts and other facilities."
You ask this and you're ensured 50% of the post of president.

Ask something like: " How's my kids doing in school."
That my friend earns you a post of the secretary.

Figure out the other question that gives you the other 50% of the pie.
So speak up!

Never live in fear

The tradisional mindset from the education system teaches us to make less or virtually no mistakes. The core teaching of the system is to get things right, and if you don't, you'll get rejected by the system. It makes us dwell in fear. Fear of making mistakes. The very mistakes that makes us grow.

I always say this to my friends : " When you fail , don't lose the lesson. Learn from it."

Whenever i see my younger peers, i see it in some of them. Not daring themselves to push the limit and be exceptional. Just merely living the mediocre life.
It's high time to make that change. Believe that you can!

Today for Engineering Mathematics Quiz:

1.What is the total sum allocated for the 880 projects under the 9th Malaysia Plan that our prime minister announced 2 days ago?

2.Which part of Indonesia was worst hit by the recent tsunami?

3. Some i,j,k vector ,angle and plane equations.

After seeing the questions, i was like... Okay... interesting... are you serious you want to ask those in a maths class?

I'll bash you up

First of all let me vent myself by saying a few fucks : FUCK FUCK FUCK !!! Damn you cao bangla! Lakia!
If i know who you are, i'll crush you!

Anyway,

Cool it Stan... your house just got broken into by some pencuri, and thank God nothing of yours and your housemates is stolen except for a box of coins. I just can't come to peace with my mind that some dirty hands went through touching my clothes and undies. Damn...

Finally !@#$!@

Finally i got internet. Damn Telekom technicians. We pay them to be inefficient. !@#*@
I need to teach them how to set the port configurations and the encapsulation modes somemore. Plus they are not giving me a rebate for their slow services, since they are already charging even though the service is not yet installed.

One day I'll buy all your stocks and sell them to your competitors. Just because TM is the only company around, doesn't mean it stays that way. I know just how smart you executives at TM are, you take months brainstorming how to sell your lousy services.

Then after you finished picking your noses in front of the other executive and smearing it under the office desk, you come up with a dumb blue hippo. Ridiculous. And all that the hippo does is nothing but to prance around in shopping malls or at expos just to reel in more people into your lousy service. Fuck you!

Surprise surprise

Wah, my friend is participating in a Beauty Pageant.

Looking into the mirror

Lately, I’ve heard people saying I appear to be the serious stan and this was not the case years ago because I was the happy-go-lucky one! I think too much these days, deep stuff too so forgive the quiet appearance. I still know how to have a good time. It just waits to be unleashed at the right moment ;)

Besides what I’ve said so far, I count myself as a good friend, son and boyfriend (when there is a girlfriend!). I love taking care of the people closest to me and I am there for them whenever they need me.

I value and cherish my family very much because they’re the ones that keep me grounded in this crazy world we call life and are the only ones I know will love me unconditionally despite what I do.

I love my close friends because they are wonderful and are my rocks. Through it all, I’m pretty laid back and enjoy every second of life that is thrown at me.

Management 101

I was in my management class, when i heard a joke that was told by a lecturer that was actually funny for the first time ever over the 4 years that i have been in MMU.

The closest joke that was funny being told by a lecturer here was about a cabbage, a goat, a tiger and a man. And that was lame. It was funny tho' because the lecturer can't pronounce cabbage. He pronounced it as 'cabbek'. And that made the crowd roared.

Anyway, back to the first ever funny joke that came out of the lecturer.

George Bush visited Queen Elizabeth in England. George Bush wanted to know how the Queen could manage her subordinates so well. So the Queen rang a bell, and Tony Blair came in.

The Queen: Tony, your parents has a child, it's not your brother or your sister, who is this child?
Tony Blair: It's me!
The Queen: Excellent. You may go.
As Tony Blair went off, President Bush was astonished by the answer.
So he went back to the States to test the question on his subordinates.

So George Bush called in his Defence Minister to come into his office.
George Bush: Your parents has a child, it's not your brother or your sister, who is this child?
Defence Minister: *thinks for a while*. Erm. I'll back to you with the answer.

After a few days, the Defence Minister still couldn't come up with the answer. And one day he bumped into Collin Powell, so he asked him the question that the president had asked him.
Defence Minister: Your parents has a child, it's not your brother or your sister, who is this child?
Collin Powell: It's me!

So the Defence Minister rushed off and went to the Oval Office to meet with the President and said,
Defence Minister: Sir, i got your man. It's Collin Powell.
The president jumped at his answer and yelled at him.
George Bush: No, you idiot, it's Tony Blair!




Okay, this joke was meant for a silent laugh.

To where yachts cruise by

"Welcome to Marina Bay!" says a big brown sign as i cherished my last few precious moments back home before I journey back to the west. This post comes a little late as CK is eager to get his hands on these photos.

^o^

That's about the reaction when I first saw the place. The place is really like Circular Quay in Sydney minus the colors and splendor.


I felt so free like the seagulls that flew alongside the car that we strode in. Cruising down the lanes that felt so free.

Simply breathtaking. After a few short moments with CK. A security officer came and said:" Boss, jangan main sini."
Okay, we weren'y playing. Apparently we were restricted area. By the way, if i were your boss, I'll kick your sorry ass.

I look better than you.

He went out of the picture for a while. After a while, i looked around to check where he was so i could take more pictures.

Boats and more boats.

A large anchor, which reminds me of the cross.

And there he was shaving and patting his dog's ass. Okay that didn't sound natural.
Let me re-phrase that, he was shaving his hair while putting his hand somewhere near his dog's ass. Okay that didn't quite come out right. Look who's playing now huh?

Bustling in they come

I was at my 'morning shrine' today holding up my cup of iced milo, and i saw this freak, 5 feet 6 inches tall i tell you, flipping through a booklet provided by the University. Like a lost lost sad sheep.

Sheesh! They are so many people. Nerve wrecking little bunch of them. I came to this conclusion cos' they came in the library like they needed air-conditioning so badly, like they would die without it.

Stop bumping into me! Maybe that's why i came up with a prejudment of them.

Into the library they come when they should just bake out in the sun or something.
Flooding walk ways of every kind, staggering around without a direction
Most of them look like geeks and looked lost. *Mek*

Okay, sherpherd is here to guild you about .
"Get out of the library and stop bumping into people !"

Maybe I'm becoming detached from them, that's why i think of it that way.
Last year's bunch was great! Why is it so different this time?
I recall I didn't look that dumb when i first came in either.

A new word a day

Pannasmontata means 'Italian baked cream'

The other day i was at Patisfrance and saw a type of ice cream called Pannasmontata which was explained as italian baked cream in brackets.

I found the name quite intriguing cos' it's the layout design or blog template i use is by Pannasmontata

I knew i was back

Bus conductor: Mana tiket? (Where's your ticket?)
Me: *shows him the bus ticket*
Bus conductor: Mana tiket yang satu lagi ( Where's the other one?)
From his facial expression he thinks that i haven't paid the fare.
Me: Ini saja yang ada. Tadi sudah bayar. (This is the only ticket I have. I've paid already.)
Bus conductor: Pergi bayar kat driver sana! Bayar satu lagi! (Pay the other one at the driver)
Me: I already paid! *looking at him with sharp eyes*

I think the guy beside me paused momentarily to absorb the impact of the shock.
I proceed to look away from the bus conductor and he moves along.

The truth is the driver issues two tickets and didn't bothered to issue two tickets for me, since it didn't made any sense. I only knew they were two tickets issued when passengers that board the bus later had two tickets. Since i board the bus early.

The rudeness felt familiar, I knew then I was heading back to the life and starting the life that i knew so well.

A new facelift

To-do-list #2:
Give your blog a new template.

I've done my template for finding-tryst ® last year on 27 May 2005.

Now it looks better. Tho' it takes time to get used to .

Thank God

Oh my God! I'm so excited that i can't contain myself! It almost felt like an orgasm.
I passed all my subjects this trimester!

Thank you Lord! For giving me that extra edge and instilling effort in me to study very hard for this trimester. Something that i haven't done in a long time.

Good start for the next trimester.

Picture tells countless words

I've flipped through many photo albums over the days back home. The images from the photos just shot straight into my senses into that old forgotten data bank located at the back of my mind.

There's a picture of Wen dancing for Curtin University Orientation Nite 2002, in a pose that she looked like a hot diva packed with her moves. I remember now, why i started dancing in the first place. I was truly inspired back then. She was also a benchmark of all girlfriends. Tall, slim and hot. Epitomes of an ideal girlfriend.

Some pictures totally paralyses me for moments i stared at it. There's loads of picture of me, Dennis, Wen and Sze Ni. We used to hang out back then. Pictures of me shyly taken with Sze Ni. Back then i kinda fancied Sze Ni. But months down the line Wen became my girlfriend.
Talking about chasing her best friend huh?

Can't believed that at one time, long long time ago, i was always hanging out with hotties.
I saw this picture of me and Sze Ni leaning back to back wiping "an invisible window", mimicking a popular Korean series back then, Autumn in my Heart?

I wanted to write all this as a recollection of my memories. I know as i write all this, it will be one of my last recollections of the past. It's like watching a fireworks display. It's always the same. It is not like I've never seen fireworks during Chinese New Year eve before. They are the same last this year as they are last year and the year before that and the year before that. But for reasons I cannot explain, something felt different that night while looking at those pictures...even though it all looked the same. For that brief moment of stolen time in my adult life, I was a child again. I felt the excitement of it. I guess that's how crushes felt like too.

One day i will forget that feeling.

Walking down memory lane

Intimidated by kids, I ran and ran. Even old aunties are faster than me. I was jogging down the lanes that i grew so familiar with. I used to come here for jogs years back with Wen and Sze Ni.

Of course i had to increase my pace. I had to use some kind of motivation. I thought about it for a while. Why not catching up to girls. Yeah. And just to lap them over and over again.

Here i was basking under the mild sun while walking in Bulatan Park. It's a park built around a lake. The park is kinda large and the track that stretched over perimeter of the lake was long. If the lake was small ,they wouldn't have built the park in the first place anyway.

One girl on a bike is kinda cute. another looked like my ex from behind. I lapped her but didn't had the guts to look her in the face. I was busy jogging anyway. I ran the whole course, just to lap her again. Didn't bothered looking. But her voice sounded familiar. Still didn't look.

If i don't look i would regret it. I was expecting some other girl's face. During the third time i lapped her on the track, i turned and looked. I froze. It's her. I said 'Hi'. Somehow Leil Lowndes tips on conversation didn't work.
"if you don't say a word. you'll regret it" a voice inside of me said.
I'm not sure i'm going to see her again after that. So i initiated conversation. Little men inside my head started operating. One of the men switched on the auto pilot. And my body and lips worked by themselves. I didn't know what i was talking, but i talked and talked. No wonder her voice seem familiar we spoke over the phone days before.

Nice conversation i thought. And i was like just listening to my own voice and didn't knew what i was talking. But it was a good one. Past love paralyzes us from reality. Ironically we met here.

Finally, her friends wanted to cross a bridge that stretched across the lake. She followed. We said our awkward goodbyes. "Bye. Yi Lu Shun Fong"
I walked down the other path. After a while, i turned a look. She and her friends were walking over the bridge. " Goodbye Wen" i said.

unfocused thoughts

I'm feeling bored. Being in a computer lab don't feel that great either. CK is beside me in the lab.
3 days into my holidays back home, I'm already feeling bored of it. Well not that I've met all my friends and really went shopping or sight seeing or anything. Not that is boring or anything. I attended my first wedding yesterday. Really ceremonious, sweet and romantic.

Since I'm online now. I'll do something rather than my 'check email only' routine. Browsing through friendster by the way is sick. So i don't do that shit. People that browse through friendster is sick. If i was to browse through. People i meet mostly came with names like Siew siew or xin xin or hui yin or duffus. Mostly la la names. The ah beng's names would be like ah beng , ah seng, mike, eric, KNS or something near to it, like KNNCCB.

To-do-list #1:
Create a fictional character

Perferably female, if you're bored you could shag her in your bedroom later.

Names like Jess or Evelyn won't work. It doesn't bring out THAT character i want. She has to be more like me.
I'm thinking..hmmm.. Vans.
Yes that would do. It has a nice ring to it too.You have to say it while raising your right eyebrow.

---

We were having our online chatting session in the very same computer lab. I look across to her. She looks as though she doesn't know me or she's too busy to look up. I would never know for sure. She always has this mysterious outlook while firing away on the keyboard whilst chatting to me. Conversation we have were usually rapid. Rapid unrelated topic changes usually end up with something interesting worth talking about.

---

She looked up finally with her bright eyes, slightly squinting them to act all philosophical and stuff. Beckoning me to go off for movies or shopping.
Anyway, Vannessa M. Tang (Vans) and I are good buddies. She has to be chinese, so her surname is Tang.
She is my alter ego during waits and idleness. And M. stands for Middle-name.


I find that talking a fictitious character more interesting than talking to a real person.

Sometimes I use Vans to live my dreams... sometimes I use her to bounce off thoughts and ideas. In this case, I use her to replace the real person who I shared this outting with.
---

More coming soon...
Next episode: To-do-list #2

Going home

His innocent eyes looked into mine, I look away in fear he saw the evil in my eyes. I work up a smile then looked to the food set before me. His innocence is intense. I shy away.

I looked , gazed upon the horizon, in attempt to escape his gaze. Beyond the reaches of my sight, i see, of mostly ugly people. Occasionally of beautiful ones, but stil mostly ugly.

From my seat, i stared at the arrivals/departures board with red displays. My flight is rescheduled. I fly in 3 hours.

Interestingly, a married couple fights drawing the highlight of the airport. Something about their baby. Screamed the woman that looked like a slut went. The man marched off with their baby. Weee..weee..weee.. the woman went on and on.

Between the hours i waited. Again glancing away at the ugly people that pushes their trollies or at people pulling their luggage. Sometimes oogling at beauties in their well curved jeans.
That's about it that happens here.

Finding 'that' tryst

What if one day, we put down all our feelings and attachments to our better half, all the memories and all the chemistry that bonds us in the first place,would we stil be able to say you love him/her?
Some might hold on and say yes they love you because:
They are insecure.
They are possessive.
They are overzealous.

The heart is always true, we all can't sense soemthing amidst when something has happened. That tiny whisper always tells you your coinscience, what's true and what's not.

I'm always a great believer of love,love compels us to real sacrifices not blind ones. If you don't love someone, don't drg on. It's nothing to do with responsibility. If that circle can't fit your square, find your square.
I'm willing to take great leaps cause I know, I have it in my hands. It's not a choice for others to make.

If you can't sort out your life, don't love.

Throne of the Prince

I'm striving to achieve my former glory. I really don't know what to put down in words, but i'm sure of my actions. Some things in life doesn't need much explanation and all this are just spontaneous thoughts running through. Everyone has a tale to tell, and through this journey, I've met very interesting people , and some rotten ones that spook around their speech. Today I've met a kin, the philosopher. It felt like mental intercourse. But in some sense, it was rape. The philosopher really reminded me of many things of myself in the past, and left me awe-struck.

I know what I have to do and I know where it will lead me. I've always analyze my actions but I miss out some key elements and finding myself taking it back. You can be driven but is that really you? I'm out on that run to find out. I'm struck on every cord.

I hope you hear from my best friends on my ideals and thoughts on this. Although sometimes I'm not sure it was necessary to say all this. I know that I will find comfort in whatever they have to say on this. I really want to hear from Deb. She'll tell me things that comforts me. I'm out in this world to Live by your own Light and Shine by your own Star.

And from CK. How even though we are so busy with our things, he still have his way to show his concerns. " Follow your heart," he would say. Something that I could easily said to myself, but it has to come from someone who cared like him, to give this wake up call.

I guess this would be a good time to mention about some other friends that unravel out of the unclear. Kim for you to ever show your over enthusiasm in my personal life. She always reminds me how fucked up this world is and still has the air about it that everything will be fine eventually. These people has exemplified the true friendship and life changing lessons. Friendship ain't objective.

All this has reminded me, what changed me in the first place. It was genuine kindness. I driven me to think what I really wanted in the first place. I want to change the world for them. Closer to reality, I might pull it off by changing lives instead of the world. It's so much more personal and rewarding.

Mong Yen really spells things right and put some fire in the belly for me today. I'm motivated and inspired.I'm impress with the level of integrity. What you truly want in life? Or are we all masked behind it all. You really made it clear of in your own way, your philosophy. Stay true to your principles. Highly opinionated.
Many could have be drawn to you by benefits possessed by you and shone away those who had less. Benefits such as material , personality tracing, the FUN-factor(being around people that are happening).
Some people might be close to others to learn things and be self absorbed in the whole experience frenzy. Hey this ain't a game, don't kill for experience. It's life.

I've so many to say, but I can't put it clearly in words. Maybe that's just what's being male all about. Lesser intellectuality in words. Speaking of which reminds me of Hui Mei how she have her good play with words still leaves me truly mused.HAH. Many of us used and are used back, in some cases- strong friendship are spawned.

All this talking also leads me to be reminded of the mental masturbating( sorry it's 430am and i cant think of a better objective excuse) Teck Houng that fills me with good thoughts.Keep it up with your good writing, and pay me endorsement fees for praising you like hell. Back to what I was initially saying.

Everytime I speak of best friends. Hilda always seems to be not in the family portrait anymore. Gaining back the friendship I once hold so true, but people grow out of friendship sometimes. I will always remember her. I really want to reach out to speak to her. But I don't regret having less initiative in putting effort into it, in life there's no time to regret. We cherished and laugh and we cried. It was happy. Always will be in my memory as one of the greatest.

And of course not to forget the enormous emotional support from Arina, at times it seems so dark, you've shown the light. I'm ever grateful. Overwhelming support although sometimes kept silent in fear of causing disturbance. I welcome disturbance. Send it those smses and calls and don't be afraid to show it. Cos it matters to me. You are important to me.

I just want to express to these people that they really molded and shaped me. I want to tell the world. "Remember your friends." Everyone deserves friendship. Have a heart for another.

A short moment with Self

Short talk: It's funny how I can make people have favourite things in their lives.

I've came so far, but I'm stil where I am. Stil at my origin, my priciples. Recent days have brought me to ponder. Sometimes of the wickedness of people; sometimes on the appreciation of life.

It's like the series Lost. The main core of the story revolves around a basic principle. No it's not about some stranded people swabbling around on some damned island. Well kinda. Which brings me to the point that it actually portrays a principle-the act of survival in which every man(or woman) it's in for himself. We don't do things without a purpose.

For instance, The black man didn't want to guard the mine if it didn't had fire arms in the cabin,cause he wanted to use the weapons to save his son. Or did the wounded needed to follow the doctor around. The intentions are obvious.

- This is my reflection when i saw one episode in LOST

Windy's Birthday Bash

At Oasis Cafe. Singing "Peng You-Guang Liang Ping Guan" with Bun Ken.

Group photo. 'Kacao b'day girl n boy' pose.



Rainy and me.


Again... Where's the rest of my pictures!!!

Group photo. 'Zheng Jing' pose.

Maybe it was last time

嘴里说的语言完全没有欺骗
屋顶灰色瓦片安静的画面
灯火是你美丽那张脸
终于找到所有流浪的终点
你的微笑就输了疲倦


千万不要说天长地久
免的你觉的我不切实际
想多么简单就多么简单
是妈妈告诉我的哲理
脑袋都是你心里都是你
小小的爱在那城里好甜蜜
念的都是你全部都是你


那一种寸步不离的感觉
我知道就叫做缘

Mungkin nanti

Maybe next time she will be coming back, when she realised it.
But that's false hope, like a fleeting dream, broken by the wake of dawn.

Those are one of the hardest words.

保重。。。
(我们还是朋友，只是普通朋友)
至少我们 正经拥有过。。。
(我会珍惜往年那时刻)
再见。。。
(还有以后吗?- Mungkin nanti?)

Stan's Theory

Just a thought if 100Kgs of rock and 100kgs of cotton is dropped from the same height, isn't the force the same?

Then why is 500 grams of cotton and 500 grams of rock dropped on ones head. The cotton will have less of a impact than of a rock when both material have the same weight.

Dammit Newton!

Round I

Some pictures from my Round I birthday party.

Welcome to the new year , asshole

I thought of writing about a new year resolution but the thought of how i began the new year kinda just made me thought of " Hey you know what... it sucks and there's not much to talk about how terrible it went". The year 2006, in a way welcomes you to the same routines and false hopes. It's like the year 2006 saying " Welcome asshole, here's to another year of torment and agony. Cheers to that!"

I remember how i saw the fireworks display through the drizzling rain. I remember how it reminded me of last year's Chinese New Year fireworks display. When you get old enough or seen enough of it, nothing is surprising anymore.

I never liked the idea of blogging about my personal life, it's like seeing your personal life flashed before your eyes in a lightly-fashioned way.

That's it for now.


I clipped my nails, empty the trash , sang numerous songs , read Electronics notes, checked my phone, ate chocolate and do things just to distract me from finishing this entry. I don't know why i procrastinated.

No Countdown plan

Now this feeling sucks.
I won't countdown in front of a tv screen.

If i had to kill myself, i'll never do it . Only aunties and grandpas and pets countdown at home.

Cold Turkey

It's like those shows on tv that portray poor people suffering in hospitals on Christmas, it is kinda like how i spent my Christmas.

Yeah i got Mumps.
HOHOHO to that.

As I was about to...

...blog something constructive today, a girl arched her back slightly, revealing a bit of her panties while sitting a row in front of me.

OKAY it's pink with green stripes. It's like those extra large panties that you get 3 pairs for RM10.

Initially I was going to blog about an incident where a girl fell right in front of me, hurting her right foot. I was in the proximity to reach out to grab her as she stumble right at my feet.
I just wouldn't reach out, since society always has it to be defensive-not reaching out to people in need.
OKAY she's hot, that's why. Imagine if I actually did something than just a mere sentence:
"Are you okay?" *looking sympathically*.
I guess it was the moment when she turned at looked at me with those soft dark eyes that I withdrew from initiating anything. Even her friends are hot. And they spoke English, which is a rare commodity these days.

Is life a result of our lack of initiative or our cowardice?

Paktoh

Pak-toh
n.
1. The act of making out.
2. A way to get your blood properly circulated.
3. For things to turn out lucky.
[Syn: the 3 S => snuggle, squeeze and stroke, petting]
The fourth S is Sex, that's what you'll get if you complete the 3S.( Did i mentioned lucky?)
Also known as the 3 F=> flirt, fondle and fool around. Of course by now you know what's the fourth F.
That's another topic entirely :-) .

Example of use:
A: Where you go just now?
B: Go pak-toh lah. (usually sound good with the suffix -lah , chinese words marr.)


Say, where are the parks in Melaka?
That's the one thing i hate about Melaka- there's no freaking parks!

After a fine dinner and good movie, couples decides to go off for some paktoh-ing.
Where?
a) Beach- Dirty and smelly. The only clean ones you'll find is where you get mugged, raped and killed cos' no one goes there, except for cracks, rapists and hippies.
b) Bukit Sebukor(near Jusco) artificial water fall? - Do you sincerely expect fun-loving Malaccan dwellers to make out in front of a fake fountain?

I really hope the thing that they are constructing in front of MBMB is a public place to paktoh.

No wonder people look so forlorn all the time.
Go paktoh lah!

A Mathematical IQ Question

(x-a) (x-b) (x-c) (x-d)= ?

Violet is the next Pink

Violet is the next Pink!

Years ago, when the fashion statement was Black, virtually no one wore pink.
Then the pink stormed the market, like some Japanese la-la violent ah lian. And pink was glorified at the throne. Even men opted for pink, I'm not saying that they look gay ; they actually look good in it.

Currently you won't see many individuals wearing violet.
I'm just speculating here. It might be the next big thing. Maybe the cut should feature this.

I'm really looking forward seeing the streets filled with people wearing Violet.
If someone made a brand of clothing and accessories all Violet it would be a hit.

Who are you today?

Maybe something more constructive this time.
I've been so out of touch these days(for the past few months),I didn't feel like blogging, felt unmotivated, too preoccupied, petty disputes and many more that I don't see the sense in explaining.

There are times when I don't seem to know who I am, trying on identities like clothes. Maybe it's just postmodernism in a dress. Most people these days are just a product of their language and their culture. At times its hard being yourself. That is easy to believe if you never belonged or felt belong in a stable family or community.

In the past I'm a victim of my choice, but now I follow my principles.

I've found myself ( and a fixed identity) in this world and I hope that everyone out there finds that balance point in life between work, relationships and friends(family).

"How far has the apple fall from the tree?"
It literally mean, how far have we strayed from our principles of life.

Online post-it #1

Stan, please remember this day- 12th October 2005.
It's a very special day.

I hate my current room!

I'm moving out soon

Reasons:
- The bitch landlady barges in my room when I'm sleeping.
-No streamyx.
- The electricity trips over 200 times since i moved in.
( Avg. electrical trips per day : 4.5)
-small like a cell.
-Toilet.
-Dirty( no matter how much i clean, it's stil dirty )
-Very far from campus.
-Roomate.
-far away from friends, eateries and etc.
-and the list goes on.


What's holding me back:
-Feels responsible for roomate.

I don't really care about ethics. Screw him. I'm moving out.

Memoir

This picture was taken during CNY. I just got it from Deb a few days ago.
Isn't she pretty? *winks*
Miss you loads mate' .

I think I'm coming back during my holidays despite the event plannings (Outdoor Fest and Tryst Prom).
Initially I didn't want to go back, but i think i'll die from loneliness in Malacca.
Besides i can go back and visit CK, which is primarily the reason i go back everytime.
Maybe sentimental reasons. Oh and my new room is horrible despite the air-conditioning.
My holidays goes on until November so i have plenty of time to work on the events. I also wanted to date this girl (in Melaka) during my holidays, but heck people like CK and friends comes first. I can get her later. Grr.

Delay the Misery

People just use you. When they need you, they come shameless to your doorstep
Only to leech onto you blatantly. There's a season for this pricks-final exams week.

The song Placebo-A Friend in Need comes to mind.
"A friend in need's a friend indeed, a friend who bleeds is better."

Selfish bastards. Taking it all in, i bet they are even bad in bed since they are selfish bastards-absorbing in every pleasure there is.

Wake me up when September ends

I kinda relate to this song:
Wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends

Like my father's come to pass
Seven years has gone so fast
Wake me up when September ends

Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars

Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are

As my memory rests
But never forgets what I lost

Wake me up when Septmber ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last

Wake me up when Septmber ends

Ring out the bells again
Like we did when spring began

Wake me up when septmber ends

Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars

Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are

As my memory rests
But never forgets what I lost
Wake me up when septmber ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when Septmber ends

Like my father's come to pass
Twenty years has gone so fast

Wake me up when September ends
Wake me up when September ends
Wake me up when September ends

Anyway,
Imagine this: I gave a prom its' name and it uses my blog theme.

I miss feeling close to God